This month The Self-Care Series will help you feel more energetic and light by getting in touch with the rhythm of nature and experimenting with the habit of eating an Earlier, Lighter Dinner. Adopting this lifestyle habit can go a long way toward improving your capacity to do your work and enjoy your life.

Most Americans tend to eat large heavy dinners. Busy days often include a quick lunch eaten on the go or while working and then a bigger, heavier evening meal after the day is done. Dinnertime is part of the social fabric of our culture. We connect with friends and loved ones over food and drink. We indulge in the name of celebrating a big win or to soothe a challenge.

The problem with this cultural norm is that it is hard on your body and mind!

Eating late in the evening puts a heavy load on your whole system. Instead of resting and rejuvenating while you sleep, the body is still digesting your big meal. Instead of detoxing and removing waste, the whole system is clogged with more material than it can handle.

A heavier, later dinner lifestyle contributes to digestive and sleep issues, low energy, and foggy thinking. It can result in added weight, stiff joints, memory decline, and degeneration of vision and hearing (often considered the inevitable effects of aging).

If you want to feel light and clear in body and mind, eating an earlier, lighter dinner can help.

Living on Mother Nature’s Schedule

Humans are physiologically designed to be active in the daytime and sleep at night. This natural phenomena has been proven by nobel laureates whose research on circadian rhythm explains the molecular processes that sustain life. Ayurveda is India’s “science of life” and provides simple, practical guidelines for living in sync with Mother Nature’s natural rhythms. This ancient wisdom is aligned with the scientific understanding of circadian rhythm.

Ayurveda’s explanation of our internal clock helps us understand that the daytime hours are best for physical labor and exercise. It’s when our digestive “fire” is strongest and our energy is more mental and creative. The nighttime hours are when the body is settling down and preparing for sleep. During sleep, our internal organs are resting and repairing.

Working Against the Clock

Our bodies are remarkable machines that can continue to function even when we live against the body’s internal clock. We fuel up on food and caffeine, catch the second wind, and keep producing long into the night. We can do this occasionally – and sometimes we have to – but over time, this rhythm is not sustainable.

A life of working against the clock is associated with the increasing occurrence of lifestyle diseases that develop over years of poor nutrition, disrupted sleep, and lack of physical activity. Choosing to live in sync with your biological clock is a simple way to feel better and avoid debilitating and hard-to-cure diseases that diminish your quality of life and shorten your lifespan.

Earlier, Lighter Dinner Basics

When you eat dinner early, you digest your food before you go to bed so your body can rest, restore, and reset overnight. Here’s how:

• Eat a satisfying lunch including protein and healthy fats. Avoid afternoon snacks.
• Eat your last meal of the day by 6pm. Choose simple foods that are easy to digest.
• Do not snack after dinner. Brush your teeth to avoid the temptation to nibble.
• Slowly adjust your mealtime by 15 minutes each week until you are eating by 6pm.
• Make a weekly meal plan so you always know what’s for dinner.

Adopting the habit of an Earlier, Lighter Dinner has many benefits. You’ll free up your evening for other nourishing activities like connecting with friends and family. You’ll make it easier for your body to rest and restore itself overnight. You’ll set yourself up to be clear and energetic the next morning. You’ll keep your body lighter and will experience fewer aches and pains as you age.

What will be your simple step toward living in sync with nature and eating an early, light dinner?

About the Author

Kirstin Pinit teaches the art of self-care through creative, engaging, and practical habit-change programs. She is a certified coach and yoga teacher and consults with cities, communities, companies, and groups on behavior-change programs and strategies. Learn more about her work at www.kirstinpinit.com.

Anita Edwards Engiles passed on Tuesday, February 26 in Portland, Oregon after a year long battle against leukemia. Anita spent most of her professional life working as a mediator, helping to broker equitable solutions to difficult problems for parties who otherwise treat each other as adversaries. Perceived to have infinite energy, Anita also dedicated time to: nurturing her lush backyard garden, traveling (for work, vacation and family visits), building community, fighting for justice and engaging in deep conversation.

If you have a remembrance or photos of Anita that you would like to share, or would like to send cards or flowers to the family, please let us know at [email protected].  

Celebration of Life

There will be a celebration of life for Anita on Saturday, April 20th. All are friends from around Oregon are welcome.

Date: Saturday, April 20th
Location:Unitarian-Universalist Church, 1685 W. 13th (corner of 13th and Chambers), Eugene, OR

Doors open at 1:00 pm.

The formal remembrances will begin at 1:30 pm, with coffee and cake to follow, and end by 4:00pm.

Remembrances of Anita

from Chip Coker

CDR (the Center for Dialogue and Resolution, in Eugene, Oregon) will be celebrating the 40^th anniversary of its founding in two years.  It was named Community Mediation Services for most of that time, but for its first year or two it was called Community Boards of Eugene.  And that’s where Anita’s connection to this agency first began.   As the story is told, Anita had recently graduated from law school at the University of Oregon.  It was late 70’s and early 80’s at the time.  The Iran hostage crisis was going on and Ronald Reagan had just been elected President.  Anita had become disillusioned with the law, and rather than take the bar exam, she instead joined up with a number of her friends from law school to talk about mediation.  The Community Boards of San Francisco had formed in 1976 and was having a big impact using a special model of mediation that they had developed for helping neighbors to resolve conflicts.  These young law graduates from Eugene connected with the founders of the San Francisco agency and made arrangements to be trained in this special model.  A short time later, they all started a small non-profit in Eugene and began offering mediation and conflict resolution training to the community, and we have been doing that ever since.  Through the years, many volunteers have come and gone, but Anita was the only volunteer to stay connected with the agency for that entire time!   She mediated countless cases for CDR, trained hundreds of new mediators, served on the CDR board of directors, donated to CDR every year, and mentored an untold number of volunteers and staff members at this agency that she loved so much.

When I first met her about a dozen years ago I was immediately struck by her boundless energy and enthusiasm for life, coupled with a serenity that could put anyone at ease.  She was always so grounded.  Another friend, Anne Bonner, said of her, “She had stove pipe legs that drove right into the earth, and deep and wide-open eyes, ever present and delighted in whatever moment she was anchored in.”   She was such a generous person, with her time, her garden bounty, her many gifts.  She ended almost every letter or email with “Hugs, Anita.”   She was always the very last person to leave any party or fundraising event we held, partly because she loved connecting with her friends, but also because she wanted to help clean up!

She didn’t look like a hippy, at least when I knew her, but she was a hippy at heart.  She was the consummate recycler and her goal every week was to not have any trash in her trash bin, and she often succeeded.  She also loved the Oregon Country Fair.  When most 70 year olds are thinking about camping, they are thinking about a well-stocked cabana or perhaps an air-conditioned RV and going someplace quiet and peaceful.  But not Anita.  Every year at the country fair she would camp in the Community Village, the heart of where hippy culture lives on in the PNW.  She slept on the ground in a little tent, amidst a plethora of music and drums and fire dances and merry-making.  But even while enjoying herself at the fair, she was still volunteering.  She was a founding member of CeDaR, which is CDR’s pseudonym for the mediation team that provides free mediation to any of the 16,000 volunteers that put on the fair.  The attached photo shows her and a few other CeDaR members in front of our mediation and empathy listening booth in the Dragon Plaza a few years back.  And as usual, Anita is at the center, joyous as ever.

From Ken Fox

Dear OMA,

Thank you for honoring such a unique spirit who, in her own beautiful way, shaped and reflected the heart of Oregon’s unique community of mediators.  I join countless others who were touched, and forever changed, by Anita. Although I moved from Portland to St. Paul, MN more than 20 years ago, my own heart has never left the PNW and I continue to be influenced even today by her way of being and the qualities of the community Anita so deeply influenced.

Anita was, and will always remain, an embodiment of why the Oregon mediation community is so special. Her presence was at the same time in-the-moment and timeless. She was humble and yet transcendent. She would walk through the fire with anyone, while always carrying a sparkle of joy and optimism about human capacity and connection.  Like so many others, I always felt a little more grounded and hopeful at the sign of her arrival in her old yellow VW beetle.

My hope is that her spirit will live on in the community she helped nourish. In that way, those who follow can continue to be sustained by the deep and clear values and presence she so fully embodied.

Ken Fox
Former OMA President and Forever Oregonian

The Self-Care Series: Habit-Change Strategies that Work 

Welcome back to The Self-Care Series! Our goal for this series is to provide you with simple, practical, and effective strategies that will help sustain the energy and passion you feel for your work. This month we’ll look at simple strategies that will help you make a long-term habit change. Relying on motivation and willpower is the wrong strategy. Find out how to be successful with your habits – even when you have LOW motivation to do so!

Why Willpower Doesn’t Work

When you are ready to make a change, you’re in a period of high motivation. It’s the perfect time for making plans, putting systems in place to support you, and for making your intentions known to a friend or accountability partner. For example, if you’re highly motivated to get more exercise, you’ll schedule workouts in your calendar, join a gym, and enlist a buddy to meet you there.

All of these actions will serve you well when you enter the inevitable periods of low motivation, when the practice of your new habit feels less exciting, HARD, or boring. Many people blame lack of willpower and drop their new habit. But the truth is, willpower doesn’t work. It’s a finite resource. Great when you have it, but once it’s used up, you need other strategies to call on.

That’s why the plans and structure you put in place when you were fired up to change are essential to keeping your habit going for the long-term.

Habit-Change Strategies that Work

You’ve just been introduced to one of the most important strategies that will help you be successful in creating healthy habits: Use your high motivation to create structure that will see you through the times when your willpower resources are used up and your motivation is low. We’ll break that strategy down into three tactics you can start using today.

Make a plan.

A habit plan is specific: what you want to create, why you want it, and how you will keep track of it. You may want to eat healthier food, get better rest, or stop binge watching Netflix. Great, but be specific: I want to eat green vegetables every day; get seven hours of sleep each night; or watch one episode at a time.

Next, ask yourself, why. Do you want to have more energy? Keep up with your workload or family life? Live longer? State your why in a short, simple phrase (e.g. be present for my kids). This statement will be your anchor. Return to it when you’re feeling stuck or unmotivated.

Finally, plan how you will track your habit. Depending on your specific habit, you might keep a journal, weigh yourself once a week, or use a fitness tracker. Know this: sticker charts are not just for kids! It worked for Jerry Seinfeld and it can work for you too.

Create a system.

Systems make it easy for you to do your habit. Schedule workouts in your calendar and put your gym bag by the door. Join a carpool to create some extra time a couple days a week. Use an app like Mealtime to make it easier to make a weekly menu of healthy meals.

Create environments that support your habit. If you’re trying to cut down on sweets, remove them from your office, purse, and pantry. If you’re prone to pick up sweets at the grocery, try a “click and collect” service that lets you select your groceries online and pick them up in the store parking lot so you won’t be tempted to cruise the candy aisle.

Write down your why statement and post it where you will see frequently. Adding support (like scheduling your habit or posting your why) and taking away temptations will set yourself up for success, especially when you are overwhelmed, tired, or distracted.

Be accountable.

Dr. Robert Cialdini is an expert on accountability. His work has shown the power of peer influence (like accountability partners) to motivate behavior. A study at Dominican University found that seventy percent of study participants who used accountability partners achieved their goals or made significant progress. No matter who you are, an accountability partnership can work for you. If you want to make your new habit stick, check in regularly with an accountability partner.

Let go of the idea that you need willpower and heaps of motivation to make a habit change. You can use your motivation to set up the plans, systems, and accountability you need to see you through the ups and the downs (especially the downs).

What new habit do you want to create in your life? Why is it important to you?

About the Author

Kirstin Pinit teaches the art of self-care through creative, engaging, and practical habit-change programs. She is a certified coach and yoga teacher and consults with cities, communities, companies, and groups on behavior-change programs and strategies. Learn more about her work at www.kirstinpinit.com.

Welcome to the first installment of The Self-Care Series! I’m excited to begin a year-long journey of empowering OMA members with self-care skills and habits. Our goal for this series is to provide you with simple, practical, and effective strategies that will help increase your capacity to fulfill your purpose in work and in life.

Mediation is a meaningful, rewarding, challenging, and demanding career. Your focus and attention are non-negotiable as you navigate tension, stress, and intense emotions. You are committed to and uphold the Core Standards of Mediation Practice. You assist people and organizations in resolving controversy and finding peace.

Your work is important, and the stakes are high.

Successful mediators are adept at maintaining focus and energy in high-pressure situations and have the ability to recover from stress, challenges, and setbacks. In other words, mediators need to be resilient.

When you are resilient you:

• Have a clear mind and calm response, even to difficult, stressful, or tragic events
• Approach life with hopefulness
• Make real connections to people and have deep and fulfilling relationships
• Do work that is fun, meaningful, and makes a contribution

If your focus, energy, and resilience are lagging, your effectiveness and success as a mediator is impaired. One of the best strategies for building resilience is to establish healthy self-care habits that address your physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental well-being.

Self-Care Defined

Self-care is more than hitting the gym regularly, getting an occasional massage, or having a night out with friends to let off steam. Sure, these activities can all be part of a healthy lifestyle. But true self-care is deeper. True self-care matches your core values and personal needs with your everyday habits and routines.

Self-care is as much a mindset as it is a thing you do. You have to believe that prioritizing care for yourself is an essential (mindset), and you have to follow through by doing the things that nourish, energize, and rejuvenate you (habits and routines).

Scientists have proven that the body, mind, and spirit are connected, and they all need your care. There is a saying (attributed to many sources) that says, “The way you do anything is the way you do everything.” In the context of self-care, tending to any aspect of your well-being will benefit your whole self.

Nurturing Your Resilience with Self-Care

Passionate professionals dedicated to their work often push self-care to the bottom of their to-do list. This unhealthy tendency creates a vicious cycle that eventually turns into a downward spiral. You may experience mental and physical health issues, poor sleep, depression, disengagement, anger, anxiety, and burnout that impact your life well beyond your profession.

You can avoid the downward spiral or reverse its direction (if you’re already in it) by making self-care a priority. In the coming months, I’ll share simple habits and habit-change techniques to increase your resilience and overall well-being. We’ll talk about:

• Morning and evening routines
• Sitting in silence (aka meditation)
• Eating and sleeping habits

We’ll also learn how to stay accountable to your habits and how to make lifestyle changes that last (spoiler: willpower is not the answer).

A Self-Care Resolution

If you’re the kind of person who makes New Year’s resolutions, consider a commitment to self-care. Allow it to be a year-long (lifelong, really) pursuit that happens in small steps and incremental changes. That way you won’t “fail” by February and give up like 92% of all resolvers do.

It’s easy to make an intention or set a goal, but without structure it’s also easy to let your deep desire dissolve into a wish that never comes true. Give yourself a SMART goal – one that is Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Timely. Get an accountability partner to help you succeed. Tell others about your commitment and you will be more likely to follow through.

What will be your self-care goal for 2019?

About the Author

Kirstin Pinit teaches the art of self-care through creative, engaging, and practical habit-change programs. She is a certified coach and yoga teacher and consults with cities, communities, companies, and groups on behavior-change programs and strategies. Learn more about her work at www.kirstinpinit.com.