The Self-Care Series: Habit-Change Strategies that Work 

Welcome back to The Self-Care Series! Our goal for this series is to provide you with simple, practical, and effective strategies that will help sustain the energy and passion you feel for your work. This month we’ll look at simple strategies that will help you make a long-term habit change. Relying on motivation and willpower is the wrong strategy. Find out how to be successful with your habits – even when you have LOW motivation to do so!

Why Willpower Doesn’t Work

When you are ready to make a change, you’re in a period of high motivation. It’s the perfect time for making plans, putting systems in place to support you, and for making your intentions known to a friend or accountability partner. For example, if you’re highly motivated to get more exercise, you’ll schedule workouts in your calendar, join a gym, and enlist a buddy to meet you there.

All of these actions will serve you well when you enter the inevitable periods of low motivation, when the practice of your new habit feels less exciting, HARD, or boring. Many people blame lack of willpower and drop their new habit. But the truth is, willpower doesn’t work. It’s a finite resource. Great when you have it, but once it’s used up, you need other strategies to call on.

That’s why the plans and structure you put in place when you were fired up to change are essential to keeping your habit going for the long-term.

Habit-Change Strategies that Work

You’ve just been introduced to one of the most important strategies that will help you be successful in creating healthy habits: Use your high motivation to create structure that will see you through the times when your willpower resources are used up and your motivation is low. We’ll break that strategy down into three tactics you can start using today.

Make a plan.

A habit plan is specific: what you want to create, why you want it, and how you will keep track of it. You may want to eat healthier food, get better rest, or stop binge watching Netflix. Great, but be specific: I want to eat green vegetables every day; get seven hours of sleep each night; or watch one episode at a time.

Next, ask yourself, why. Do you want to have more energy? Keep up with your workload or family life? Live longer? State your why in a short, simple phrase (e.g. be present for my kids). This statement will be your anchor. Return to it when you’re feeling stuck or unmotivated.

Finally, plan how you will track your habit. Depending on your specific habit, you might keep a journal, weigh yourself once a week, or use a fitness tracker. Know this: sticker charts are not just for kids! It worked for Jerry Seinfeld and it can work for you too.

Create a system.

Systems make it easy for you to do your habit. Schedule workouts in your calendar and put your gym bag by the door. Join a carpool to create some extra time a couple days a week. Use an app like Mealtime to make it easier to make a weekly menu of healthy meals.

Create environments that support your habit. If you’re trying to cut down on sweets, remove them from your office, purse, and pantry. If you’re prone to pick up sweets at the grocery, try a “click and collect” service that lets you select your groceries online and pick them up in the store parking lot so you won’t be tempted to cruise the candy aisle.

Write down your why statement and post it where you will see frequently. Adding support (like scheduling your habit or posting your why) and taking away temptations will set yourself up for success, especially when you are overwhelmed, tired, or distracted.

Be accountable.

Dr. Robert Cialdini is an expert on accountability. His work has shown the power of peer influence (like accountability partners) to motivate behavior. A study at Dominican University found that seventy percent of study participants who used accountability partners achieved their goals or made significant progress. No matter who you are, an accountability partnership can work for you. If you want to make your new habit stick, check in regularly with an accountability partner.

Let go of the idea that you need willpower and heaps of motivation to make a habit change. You can use your motivation to set up the plans, systems, and accountability you need to see you through the ups and the downs (especially the downs).

What new habit do you want to create in your life? Why is it important to you?

About the Author

Kirstin Pinit teaches the art of self-care through creative, engaging, and practical habit-change programs. She is a certified coach and yoga teacher and consults with cities, communities, companies, and groups on behavior-change programs and strategies. Learn more about her work at www.kirstinpinit.com.

Welcome to the first installment of The Self-Care Series! I’m excited to begin a year-long journey of empowering OMA members with self-care skills and habits. Our goal for this series is to provide you with simple, practical, and effective strategies that will help increase your capacity to fulfill your purpose in work and in life.

Mediation is a meaningful, rewarding, challenging, and demanding career. Your focus and attention are non-negotiable as you navigate tension, stress, and intense emotions. You are committed to and uphold the Core Standards of Mediation Practice. You assist people and organizations in resolving controversy and finding peace.

Your work is important, and the stakes are high.

Successful mediators are adept at maintaining focus and energy in high-pressure situations and have the ability to recover from stress, challenges, and setbacks. In other words, mediators need to be resilient.

When you are resilient you:

• Have a clear mind and calm response, even to difficult, stressful, or tragic events
• Approach life with hopefulness
• Make real connections to people and have deep and fulfilling relationships
• Do work that is fun, meaningful, and makes a contribution

If your focus, energy, and resilience are lagging, your effectiveness and success as a mediator is impaired. One of the best strategies for building resilience is to establish healthy self-care habits that address your physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental well-being.

Self-Care Defined

Self-care is more than hitting the gym regularly, getting an occasional massage, or having a night out with friends to let off steam. Sure, these activities can all be part of a healthy lifestyle. But true self-care is deeper. True self-care matches your core values and personal needs with your everyday habits and routines.

Self-care is as much a mindset as it is a thing you do. You have to believe that prioritizing care for yourself is an essential (mindset), and you have to follow through by doing the things that nourish, energize, and rejuvenate you (habits and routines).

Scientists have proven that the body, mind, and spirit are connected, and they all need your care. There is a saying (attributed to many sources) that says, “The way you do anything is the way you do everything.” In the context of self-care, tending to any aspect of your well-being will benefit your whole self.

Nurturing Your Resilience with Self-Care

Passionate professionals dedicated to their work often push self-care to the bottom of their to-do list. This unhealthy tendency creates a vicious cycle that eventually turns into a downward spiral. You may experience mental and physical health issues, poor sleep, depression, disengagement, anger, anxiety, and burnout that impact your life well beyond your profession.

You can avoid the downward spiral or reverse its direction (if you’re already in it) by making self-care a priority. In the coming months, I’ll share simple habits and habit-change techniques to increase your resilience and overall well-being. We’ll talk about:

• Morning and evening routines
• Sitting in silence (aka meditation)
• Eating and sleeping habits

We’ll also learn how to stay accountable to your habits and how to make lifestyle changes that last (spoiler: willpower is not the answer).

A Self-Care Resolution

If you’re the kind of person who makes New Year’s resolutions, consider a commitment to self-care. Allow it to be a year-long (lifelong, really) pursuit that happens in small steps and incremental changes. That way you won’t “fail” by February and give up like 92% of all resolvers do.

It’s easy to make an intention or set a goal, but without structure it’s also easy to let your deep desire dissolve into a wish that never comes true. Give yourself a SMART goal – one that is Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Timely. Get an accountability partner to help you succeed. Tell others about your commitment and you will be more likely to follow through.

What will be your self-care goal for 2019?

About the Author

Kirstin Pinit teaches the art of self-care through creative, engaging, and practical habit-change programs. She is a certified coach and yoga teacher and consults with cities, communities, companies, and groups on behavior-change programs and strategies. Learn more about her work at www.kirstinpinit.com.